About Therapy
“I’ve been putting off therapy for a long time…”
What’s the point of going through the motions, hiding your compulsive behaviors, avoiding conflicts, or giving in?
You’re waking up to the real issues – it’s not about the motions, the behaviors, the conflicts, or the other people.
It’s about you.
Your authentic self has not had its fair share of time in the spotlight.
Everything does not have to be so empty or arduous.
If the effort were enough to eliminate them, you would have achieved that long ago. It’s time for something different.
Your hopes and dreams are right here…
The freedom and inner peace that you long for are within reach.
The ability to be open in each new situation – the capacity to notice, feel, and know what to do with your feelings is available to you.
You can manage what life throws at you without breaking or backing down.
Those glimpses of presence in your life – to be in the here and now, not stuck in the past or longing for the future but to really be present – can expand in the most healthy way.
But despite your success, something’s just not right.
Not achieving your goals is hard, but it may be harder to achieve them and feel hollow once you’re there.
Or you finally got the partner you’ve been looking for, and something feels off. Why is there so much tension in being with this person?
You’re at an interesting point in your life…
Part of you wants to give up.
Another part wants to keep making more goals, hoping each new achievement will fill the void – keep trying the same thing expecting different results.
I know you’ve tried a lot of things already…
Self-help books, dietary changes, exercise, natural remedies… you may have even tried some therapy.
Plus, you have your own thoughts on things. After all, you’re insightful… you can think things through and figure out what the issues are.
But it’s not enough.
Talking about it is not enough…
Thinking about it is not enough…
None of it has helped you change in a meaningful way.
But here’s the cool part…
Given the right set of circumstances, the psyche can heal itself. It’s like a broken arm that heals on its own when set properly.
And you’re in luck… because I’m trained to create that set of circumstances for you.
I provide the atmosphere and space where you can connect your thoughts and emotions, discover your intuition, and learn to live with ease and flow.
Don’t worry: It won’t be daunting, overwhelming, or boring.
I’ll admit that I’m often a bit awkward at the beginning of each session. I am excited and eager to meet with you and can say goofy things I do not anticipate. But it’s kind of nice because it can be pretty funny!
I can think outside the box, in the box, or around the box. I totally get what it’s like to overthink things. I love helping you break down a situation and discover new angles when it is helpful.
I value humor, creativity, and spontaneity in session.
It involves a lot of courage and trust to move beyond your intellect, knowing that your body and intuition may have something for you.
When we can get out of our own way, some very wise, lovely, and occasionally hilarious things can show up, waiting to nourish us and carry us forward.
And as we work together, you’ll take the lead on where we go, but I’ll always hold the question:
What are you doing here in my office and on this earth?
Here’s what I want for you – the obvious and not-so-obvious…
Of course, I want your symptoms to be reduced. After all, you’re here because you know something is “off.”
But even more than that, I want your life restored… and for you to live out your purpose.
We’ll take your present circumstances and view them in the context of your overall life, goals, and pain.
This is what will heal your past and your present.
Some of what we’ll do together…
Feelings that are not felt get stored. And they wait. They wait for a similar incident to have their chance to be felt and expressed.
Have you thought after a minor infraction that your emotional reaction was much bigger than expected?
There it is.
The work I do connects the past and the present. It also connects the head and the heart, so both are more aligned.
As Christians, we have the Holy Spirit living inside of us.
He speaks to us through our emotions and what happens inside our bodies.
Wouldn’t it be great to know what they are telling you so that you can show up as the real you and live the life for which you’re created?
About Me
I remember when I learned that talking wasn’t enough…
I had a really hard week.
The way I was thinking about it was making it worse.
Despite all my tools of reframing or challenging my thoughts, they did not provide the relief I was seeking.
My reaction to the present circumstances was larger than I would expect.
I knew this was about something from my past though I did not know how to access it.
Even if I had hunches about the root cause, I could not connect it in a meaningful way.
At first, I was skeptical about somatic work…
I thought somatic work was kind of woo woo. How can people really “listen to their body”?
It seemed out of reach – at worst: people were lying about being able to tap into their intuition, and at best, I was just not capable of it. Neither of those conclusions was comforting.
There were times when paying attention to my feelings has been very useful, but they have also led me astray more often than I would like to admit.
Many dilemmas seemed to show up as warring parts of me, and I was unsure which part to trust and which to follow.
It showed me that I could take my knowledge of “what happened to me” and have a new experience with it – one that didn’t make me rev up to fight when I thought about it – one that didn’t tell me to run or hide – one that didn’t freeze me with fear. I slowly and gently reworked the pain of the past and was able to discover my true self in the process.
I’ve been doing this stuff for a while now…
I’ve done it in various capacities since 2006 – from community mental health to chemical health treatment centers to private practice.
I founded Illuminate Counseling…
… because I know firsthand that pain and suffering can be transformed into life and joy. I am biased that when we are more present in our life, we are more responsive. Thus, the more choice we have to respond rather than be at the whim of past wounds or the actual or perceived expectations of others.
When we have a choice in how we respond, we have the option to show up as loving, kind, and compassionate.
I strive for a greater presence in my own life which allows for a deeper connection to myself, my loved ones, and my environment. I want you also to experience greater freedom and ever deeper connection in your journey.
In my personal life…
I’m married and a mother of three young children, including a set of twins and a kiddo with special needs.
I am an avid runner and have run two marathons (with the goal to run one more). I love being outdoors and going on adventures, even just to explore a new park or coffee shop in town.
I’m an optimist, which allows me to hold hope. You can grow through suffering and find treasures in the darkness. I also love to laugh and regularly bring that into session to make the hard stuff a little more manageable.
“Where light and dark begin to touch is where healing can arise.”
– Author Unknown
If you’ve read this far, I’m impressed.
That mixture of excitement and fear tells you this is the next step.
Call me today for a free 20-minute consultation: (651) 412-3247. You’ll share what you want to work on, ask me any questions you may have, and we will determine whether we want to take the next steps out of the darkness into the light.